Parenting tales, broken bones, and boy howdy I hope you like condiments. Plus: The Assassin’s Creed movie, The Last of Us Part II, Dreamfall: The Longest Journey, and we try our very best not to play a Star Wars game. Do we succeed? (Spoiler: Of course not.)

Tim and Richard revisit the 2010 “classic” Alpha Protocol, once they remember which game that is exactly. Plus, a spoiler-packed dismantling of the first season of Star Trek Picard, and our hopes (or lack thereof) for Strange New Worlds. For the spoiler-averse, don’t worry, we tell you when to stop listening.

In our longest episode ever Capn’ Timmy and Commander Naik blow through all semblance of time management to bring you their definitive rankings of two of their favorite gaming franchises – Assassin’s Creed and Mega Man. It’s a doozy. Also some blurbs on Torchlight II and a rather disappointing selection for the next randomizer game.