A Match Made In Heaven

HIGH It’s an addicting puzzler that’s eating up my free time.
LOW How the hell am I this bad at Tetris?
WTF I gotta stop playing at work!
HIGH It’s Bayonetta and Vanquish updated and on a modern console.
LOW It’s *only* Bayonetta and Vanquish on a modern console.
WTF Constant game references and robot dance parties.
Just when you thought all the lists were done, baybay! Yes, the internet content machine definitely loves it some listmaking, and here we have yet another opportunity to quench the thirsts of people who demand things be ranked numerically — kinda funny to think about it when you realize how much people hate review scores.
HIGH SHENMUE III IS A REAL VIDEOGAME AND I PLAYED IT.
LOW Will be seen as as laughably dated to newcomers.
WTF The 19 different ways western voice actors say the name “Ryo”.
HIGH The retro inspired 1964 Tokyo Games.
LOW The modern minigames throughout the story mode.
WTF Why wasn’t Big the Cat invited!?!
HIGH That opening theme song, yo.
LOW Lacks the pizzazz and nostalgia that made the previous such a good time.
WTF Sega had one job: put Segata Sanshiro in the game. They failed.
HIGH Toejam & Earl are back.
LOW The clash between character models and backgrounds.
WTF T&E were almost SEGA mascots – imagine that world.
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