Come Get Some… New Lighting And Levels!
HIGH: Even better than the original.
LOW: Finicky aiming system, plus nonexistent multiplayer.
WTF: Duke in Amsterdam coffee shops.
HIGH A gorgeous update with indelible gameplay for new and old fans alike.
LOW Navigating 3D space is cumbersome and difficult to master.
WTF Absolute blackness and depth of space might induce an existential crisis.
HIGH The first mission manages to capture some of the magic of Cameron's film.
LOW Trying to unhook fuel lines while Xenomorphs kill me during the animation and my squadmates stand there watching.
WTF An enemy merc shot me dead from around a corner and behind a steel crate. JFK's magic bullet lives…
HIGH That box art is pretty nifty.
LOW The alien is crouched in front of me, ready to spr- no, wait, it's still crouching… still crouching while I shoot it… Now it's dead, and its buddy has come to crouch in its place.
WTF How did a major title get released in this state?
HIGH The touchdown on LV426 is adequately realized.
LOW Everything else.
WTF They released this colossal pile of dross at full price?
HIGH Mopping up a roomful of baddies with a buddy in short order makes you giddy.
LOW My low level runthrough gave me +5 Gray Hairs.
WTF Me: "Did we just murder the Ninja Turtles?"
HIGH Millions of guns to choose from, theoretically…
LOW The "adventure" is pure contrivance, utterly lacking a soul.
WTF Where's the onscreen mini-map? Why do weak guns auto-equip?
Borderlands is the game everyone's talking about at the moment, although I have to admit that I'm a little bit (well, okay, a lot) puzzled at all of the positive buzz is getting. It's currently rocking an 84 at MetaCritic and no one has a bad word to say about it on Twitter. However, my experience was basically the opposite… it started poorly and failed to come together for me, leaving me bored and disaffected.