Don’t Let the Subtitle Fool You
HIGH The new setting is a welcome change of pace from the dark, sci-fi aesthetic of the main game.
LOW It’s rarely clear where to go next.
WTF Slaughtering crazed theme park mascots.
Welcome to This Is Not A Review. In these articles we discuss general impressions, ideas and thoughts on any given game, but as the title implies, it’s not a review. Instead, it’s an exercise in offering a quick recommendation (or dismissal) after spending enough time to grasp the ideas and gameplay of a thing without necessarily playing it from A to Z.
The subject of this installment: Farming Simulator 17, developed Giants Software and published by Focus Home Interactive.
HIGH The best traditional PC RPG in recent years, now accessible on console.
LOW A PC-centric UI means console owners will spend more time in menus than they'd like.
WTF A "quick" save that takes upwards of 20 seconds to complete.
HIGH Rolling two red dice and making my opponent decide between 'knocked down' and ‘knocked down'.
LOW Missing my receiver roll and losing the game-tying touchdown in the last turn.
WTF Wait, the color commentator is on my team now? How did that happen?
HIGH Navigating the deduction space of Sherlock's mind
LOW Awful, unresponsive lockpicking controls
WTF Doing bumps of "sap powder" in the clubhouse of a zen garden
HIGH The ‘odd couple' character dynamic and fantastic writing.
LOW The rushed, unnecessary origin/dream sequence.
WTF Psychic rape? Really? It couldn't have been called anything else?
HIGH The first two chats with the demon, and a nifty skillset for Vulcan.
LOW Having my partner glitch out and disappear when I needed backup.
WTF I gotta collect crystals? What is this, a joke?
HIGH Killing the blisteringly incompetent leader of the Resistance.
LOW Having to run back and forth through a whole city repeatedly for the serial killer quest.
WTF I'm in a major city, and the best available weapon is still a metal rod with some razor blades riveted to it?
HIGH The amount of loving care poured into every aspect of the game.
LOW …every aspect except the laughably shoddy English translation.
WTF Is the deal with the "final battle"?