One Step Forward, Two Steps Back
HIGH The cute androids. The catchy music. The frenzied, strategic battles.
LOW Wow, this game got harder since the preview version.
WTF No, really—why is it so difficult?
HIGH Finally nailing that mid-air vault off a flying cart to collect a secret skull.
LOW Slamming into the same wall over and over again in the terrible speed section.
WTF I may have a new favorite video game skeleton.
Bring Eight Friends
HIGH Being in a room with eight friends, taking the lead in a race, stopping before reaching the trophy to taunt and still managing to win.
LOW The online community is pretty small.
WTF Picking up the power-up that switches places with another player while in the lead and ending up dying instead.
HIGH The first time an Alien crawls out of the ground and savages a terrorist.
LOW Getting a bad draw of characters against the final boss… six times in a row.
WTF I almost feel bad about completely slaughtering everything as the Predator.
HIGH Piloting a blob firing projectiles and swinging swords in all directions
LOW Playing chicken against bullet-pattern reload periods
WTF Enemies can be picked up, but bosses can't
Great balls of fire…and lava…and spikes…
HIGH: Absolutely stunning graphics. How did this start as a mobile game?
LOW: It's one minecart short of being a platform parody.
WTF: Someone on the dev team said, "You know what this inflatable bathmat needs? Ron Swanson's mustache."
I am my own worst enemy
HIGH Intriguing mechanic and great haunted house aesthetic
LOW A bit bare-bones on extra modes and features
WTF I killed myself again!
Magical Bears and Treasure-Hunting Rabbits
HIGH The art direction and production are superb.
LOW Losing to enemies' Prestige victories over and over again.
WTF Who thought this text was a good, readable size?