Author: Sparky Clarkson

Burnhouse Lane Review

The Body As A Temple Of Doom HIGH Bloody Mary and her sweetheart. LOW The third chapter, boringly premised and absurdly presented. WTF I defeated a spider by knocking it into a shallow hole? You know they crawl up walls, right? Angie Weathers is dying of cancer and there is […]

Backbeat Review

HIGH Petting the dog! Players must pet the dog.

LOW Spending too much time getting Chaz to the sax in “Crouching Bassline, Hidden Saxophone”.

WTF Why do these people take their instruments everywhere?


Xenoblade Chronicles 3 Review

HIGH Dealing 5 million damage and completely healing my party on the verge of defeat.

LOW Nuking a boss before a cutscene where the same boss was wrecking my party.

WTF Can we not have a colony full of preteens in skintight suits please?


Ubisoft Forward 2022: Assassin’s Creed Showcase

In 2007, Assassin’s Creed fused elements of stealth and platforming gameplay into something new. An imperfect and at times clunky game, it nonetheless sparked wide interest thanks to its unique approach to play and strikingly detailed historical setting. With a few further refinements, it became a landmark franchise.


Amnesia: Rebirth Review

Circling In The Dark

HIGH A played childbirth sequence is a bold choice.

LOW Oh, the rug is being pulled out at the last second again! Color me surprised.

WTF So many matches and oilcans in these ancient Roman ruins!