Author: Sparky Clarkson

Ovivo Review

Too Little

HIGH The first time a level pulls back and reveals its full form.

LOW Oh hey, you reversed the controls. How clever, how droll.

WTF I’m being chased by an eel?


This Is Not A Review: STRAFE

Welcome to This Is Not A Review. In these articles we discuss general impressions, ideas and thoughts on any given game, but as the title implies, it’s not a review. Instead, it’s an exercise in offering a quick recommendation (or dismissal) after spending enough time to grasp the ideas and gameplay of a thing without necessarily playing it from A to Z.

The subject of this installment: STRAFE, developed by Pixel Titans and published by Devolver Digital.


Mafia III Review

Bored On The Bayou

HIGH The sharply-paced opening sequence and its climactic cutscene.

LOW Competing in the awful, rubber-banded street races.

WTF Cops won’t reliably go after me for shooting a guy, but if I dent a cop car, they’ll gun me down. Just like real life!


Wasted Review

Like your time

Wasted

HIGH Taking out an S.O.B. Purifier

LOW Losing everything because I took the wrong fork at the start of a level.

WTF This is the grossest take on Richard Nixon ever, right?


Anima: Gate of Memories Review

Forget it

Anima

HIGH The boss fight against Kappel shows off most of the game’s best ideas.

LOW A boss fight where my controls got inverted and then I got stun-locked to death.

WTF Ergo singing a knockoff of the “Reading Rainbow” theme.


TurnOn Review

Identity Crisis

TurnOn

HIGH Uniting the dopey lovers at the café.

LOW The runner level with the Ferris wheel.

WTF This skyscraper sure has a lot of exposed external wiring on it, huh.


Stories: The Path of Destinies Review

Groundhog Fox

Stories:The Path of Destinies_20160407132542

HIGH Finally getting a decent ending.

LOW Basically any fight after about the first three playthroughs.

WTF You have sky pirates, magic gems, floating islands, and an anthropomorphic fox hero and the best title you could manage was Stories: The Path of Destinies? Seriously?