Whiptail

It's June 2005, and I've just finished playing a videogame where my only interaction with the level was when I was asked—non-ironically, mind you—to find a series of color-coded keycards to open a series of doors. I could stop the review right here, and anyone who knows anything about First Person Shooters would know all they needed to about the game. For those who don't consider themselves aficionados of the genre, however, I'll continue, and try to point out all of the other things that Psychotoxic does wrong.

According to ESRB, this game contains: Blood, Sexual Themes, Violence

Game Description: PsychoToxic places gamers in the shoes of heroine Angie Prophet who, unbeknownst to her, must save humankind from impending nuclear Armageddon. The year is 2022, the place is New York City, and as Angie's role as savior unfolds, so too does her understanding of why she is the only one that stands in the way of the Fourth Horseman of the Apocalypse and the destruction of civilization. Throughout the game, Angie continues to discover a series of unique abilities, such as invisibility, the slowing of time, and the infiltration of other's dreams, all of which aid her progress.

Game Description: A psychological thriller with a punch ending; epic's unreal warfare engine; gary coleman: special guest star; liquid dynamics: pours, drips, runs and puddles; al sophisticated al supports people and animal interactions; Postal 2 is about humour with absurd, over-the-top violent content.

I suppose the easiest way to start a review of Postal 2 would be for me to describe some horrible, shocking atrocity I'd committed, then make a wry comment about the state of videogames today. I'm not going to, because there really wasn't anything horrible or shocking about the game.

According to ESRB, this game contains: Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Mature Humor, Strong Language, Use of Drugs