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Old 03-12-2013, 04:35 PM   #2
Pedro
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Re: Demos Decide. Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance

Hey kingettr

God dammit, I had a longer reply typed out and the site kicked me out, so sorry, but this'll be a summary!

Good job overall, I think you could do with some heavy editing to remove some superfluous phrases and also remove some of the assumptions you make which may or may not be true - for example:

Quote:
the game industry is moving away from games that tickle the critical thinking membrane

It should appeal to all gamers because of its violence alone

Games like this that also involve a cyborg with a dry sense of humor are very popular
The main body of your text is pretty good; I was going to suggest that you take yourself out of the review and instead talk about things like "Vision-impaired gamers will find..." and "Those who have trouble with pressing many buttons at once on the controller should..." but then I realised that it should be reviewed from your point of view rather than some generic disabled gamer. So it is all good - what I'm trying to say is that usually I'd say to a reviewer, it's too personal, remove yourself from the piece, but in this case it makes sense.

So good stuff, but again, a bit of re-reading and editing needed on your part. Like I said to Mithrono, dunno if anyone from the staff checks down here any more, but good luck!
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