Dude, hasn't anybody finished anything
since the last time i posted here? come on, guys...
So the wife and I just finished Army of Two
today, playing the entire
thing co-op from start to finish, just as the developers intended.
My impression? I’m severely underwhelmed.
In a nutshell, the game was incredibly straightforward and just flat-out dull in most areas.
Level design was unmemorable, and most of the action was the same sort of ‘hordes of enemies materialize from out of nowhere’
stuff that stopped being interesting years ago.
Even worse, there were a ridiculous number of bulletproof gun turrets and bulletproof soldiers, both requiring one player to distract them while the other sneaks up from behind to deliver damage. Not only did this kind of stuff reek of ‘videogamey-ness’, it was just totally uninspired and repeated far too often.
The story and characters were a joke, too… I seriously couldn’t remember who was who and what was going on thanks to the extremely poor choice of delivering most storytelling and information through audio chatter in the middle of heated firefights when the player is completely occupied doing something else.
By the time we finished the game, I couldn’t even remember what my own character’s name was… the whole thing felt very generic and phoned-in.
There were tons of other little problems like certain areas of the game glitching up and requiring a restart, or how the characters have no believable sense of maneuverability in the environment… it’s another game where you can only climb up things that the developers want you to climb up, and you’re not allowed to hop down a three-foot ledge unless it’s the right
The best thing about Army of Two
was that the characters looked like the Jason twins from Friday the 13th, and being able to play co-op is always a plus in my book… besides those two things, there’s really nothing exceptional or interesting about the game, honestly. I expected a lot more from a title getting such a big push from EA, and any future sequel will have to bring a hell of a lot more to the table than this one did.